Of Princes Paupers And The Terrible Danger Of Overshadowing One’s Children By ‘Tope Fasua
A normal person’s joy should be to see his/her children do a lot better in everything that s/he does in a lifetime.
2. However as we struggle through life, never looking back, and uprooting any barrier to our success, we sometimes ‘make it’ because we are daring, or because we know the price of failure, having experienced poverty, such that our children live forever in our shadows - as mediocres - having never grown some spine or enough mental muscle. Some people also love it that way, and that is plain wicked.
3. The quest to measure up - at least in terms of fame - and to also make it big, quick and easy, is driving children of the rich and accomplished into professions in entertainment, fraught with a lot of instability, and at the risks of lives unhinged.
I am compelled to write this by recent events.forbes.comyohaig.ng</a> Of note is the trouble around David Adeleke, the self-acclaimed "Omo Baba Olowo" (rich man’s son), whose song is 100 percent about money, sex, fame, fortune, enjoyment and acquisition of earthly things. This is a boy who has carved a niche from himself, from the fabric of controversy, and he does have a solid following among many Southern Nigerian boys. He is the one who wanted to smuggle his child out of Nigeria until he was stopped by Mr. Dele Momodu, whom he later disgraced by calling him ‘my boy’ in an open concert where Dele was present. He is the one whose mobile police escorts shoot happily into the air when picked up from the Lagos airport. He is the one who mocked Paul Okoye (PaulO) about his house in 1004 Estates. He is there in every controversy.
Anyway, three of Davido’s friends and hangers on died within five days of each other. All of them were tragic cases. The first, Tagbo, died on his 35th birthday. The other two died together in a car in the basement of a building in Nigeria’s most expensive neighbourhood - Banana Island. Police have said that the Tagbo died of asphyxiation, while items suspected to be hard drugs were found in the car with the other two dead young boys, one of who was the first son of a billionaire oil magnate, Dapo Abiodun, CEO of Heyden Oil. Looking at Gbenga Abiodun’s picture, he looked like a gentle boy, not a druggie, but all of these boys lived on the fast lane, hopping from club to club, and hugging the night life big time, because that is what their ‘jobs’ demanded. It is also a matter of time before one’s friends influence one negatively. Gbenga was one of Davido’s Deejays, even though I learnt he had a car armouring business and was on the verge of opening a filling station and car wash. Anyway, he’s no more. Fine chap.economist.comyohaig.ng</a> Sad.
One of my favourite sayings is one that goes: "Every prince descends from a pauper, and every pauper, from a prince". Let us consider the import of this saying in some greater depth. First is to say that there is a likelihood if you trace everyone’s history today, that those who are rich had some very poor ancestors, while those who are poor may likely have had prosperous ancestors back in history. It just means that one needs to be careful. I recall some gatemen in a house I used to live. One boasted on end about how he is the son of one of the deceased Alara of Ilaramokin in Ondo State. The other boasted often of his father’s house at Ijapo Estate GRA, an exclusive area in Akure in the same state. The first one had a drug problem and was soon laid off. The second one is a dispatch rider at a bank today.britannica.comyohaig.ng</a> There was another one among the gatemen, who came to Abuja from the East, precisely Ebonyi State. He never boasted of any such background, but today, he runs a depot where Nigerian Breweries supplies him drinks for the Lugbe community in Abuja. He turns over millions every month.
The danger is that those who are raised in luxury really have no incentive to strive and may therefore not continue the trajectory of their fathers who often struggled to become what they are. That is why they say it is difficult to keep wealth in a family beyond say three generations - except you have a way of passing on this kind of knowledge. Again, knowledgeable people - say in Europe, Japan, China and the USA - have been able to find their ways around this generational issue and to keep money long within a family. But here in black Africa, we have little clue. Some days back someone wrote on social media and asked where the families of those long gone Yoruba big men whom musicians praised to high heavens are. I once met one of Herbert Macaulay’s grandsons who was a cabbie in London. Herbert was a big man in his time.
